The Single Complex

This weekend was homecoming, perhaps the one day of the year I stay off of the Book of Faces as ardently as possible. There are two sorts of trash that appear, overwhelming my newsfeed for 12 hours. The first type is best defined by this:

"Oo! Ooooh! Look at me! I got a date! Look, guys, I'm popular!'

The other is more like this:

"Oh my gosh guys why won't anybody go to homecoming with meeeee?"

I can't decide which one is more annoying, but both bug me for the same reason. They imply that being single is a very bad thing. Everywhere in high school, a similar message is projected. If you don't have somebody to hold hands with as you skip down the hallway, there's no way your life could be happy.

Totally untrue.

The problem with high school dating is that it's a status symbol. If you get a girlfriend, if you can not get your heart broken IF you can find somebody desperate enough to date YOU, you have reached the end. This silly afterthought "love" doesn't matter, what matters is that you found someone who has a nice butt and is willing to call herself your girlfriend. And the sad thing is that it's not for them. And it's really not for you, either. It is to impress a bunch of other people who are floundering around in the same way.

The problem is that we buy into it. So many people are basing their entire happiness on whether or not they can get a date. The great irony is that such moaning and wallowing in self-despair is unattractive. If you want a date, go freaking get one. Anybody can get a date. Not everybody will find you attractive, but somebody will. If you really want a date, track that person down. But please stop moaning about it.

There's a group of people who I hold a great deal of respect for: the "Single-by-choice" group. These are the folks who are good-looking, not socially inept, and likable. Yet, they remain mysteriously unattached. When asked why, they say they don't want to date. The crazy thing is that they're being 100% honest. This is a crazy admirable thing. They've reached a level of understanding most teenagers haven't.

The simple truth is that if you've got a soul mate out there, they probably don't live in your school district. There are a lot of people in the world, and the very fact that they live in the same location as you probably lowers their compatibility. The SBC crowd knows this, and they live accordingly. Sure, there are people you'll get along with in high school, and it's okay to date them, but please please PLEASE don't make it your life. Something better comes down the road, and there's too much to do in high school to afford wasting your time on a faux-serious relationship.

Here's to you, Single by Choice people.

PS: Ladies, this doesn't mean I've gone asexual or anything. I'm still single and ready to mingle. Just don't expect me to get caught up with the hormone bog that is high school.