The End, Part III

First off, a brief announcement: I'm backed up on posts. This, of course, means that I have several deep thoughts, they just need to be put out on display for the world to see. These are all going to be here soon. Some things you may look forward to reading:

Surprises, Part II
Results
Participation Points and Punks
Thoughts on Whatever I Just read in Crime and Punishment
Timing
One Little efy and How He Grew


Now, onto the post itself.

Goodbyes are bittersweet, often for the same reasons. On one hand, you enjoy the opportunity of leaving behind everything you didn't like. On the other, you are forced to leave behind everything you loved. Today, I left the one and only STARTALK for the third time. Each year has blessed me with a different flavor, a different set of challenges and pleasant surprises.

This year, of course, was no exception. I had my ups and downs, my great days and my wangsty day. Returning home will be no small feat. I find myself missing such things as homework, dorm rooms, and meals surrounded by efys. These are days of my life that I will not be able to return to, and I have cherished it as much as I could. Every year, I tell myself that I must recreate these moments. So I re-apply. It's not the same, of course, but then I remember why I love it so. This year, however, is different.

At this time next year, I will be graduated. Up until this point, I have been positive I could make it in again. Now, I'm not so sure. This could very well be my last goodbye. The final end, if you will.

The above thought is not one I usually like to think, but it occurs to me that this had already happened. Out of the 50 people I knew in STARTALK 2010, a grand total of 2 returned. My first year is gone. Things end. Life moves on.

This is one of the saddest endings of them all, but I will survive. It takes a while to readjust to the other 98% of the bell curve. Even so, with a clear goal in mind, I intend to begin anew, and let this very bittersweet end truly come to a close. I will cry manly tears tonight, I will remember my new aquatints with fondness, then I will move on.

That's a lie. I'm not going to move on. I will build on. I stand here with the utmost intent to see every member of my group of peers ten years from now.

It's midnight, my words turn to gibberish. Chinese camp 2012, it's been real.


Peace out, readers.