Willful Obliviousness

A funny thing about humans is that if there's something they don't want to believe, they won't. You can pour in overwhelming amounts of evidence, but if they're in denial, it won't happen. In politics, it's annoying, in debate, it's painful, but in the public relations part of our life? It's pretty entertaining.

Yep. This post is Eli's relationship advice lecture. Ladies, gentlemen, listen up. Here we go.

Every time you think a guy's just being "really nice", he's sitting Somewhere nearby, staring at a camera, thinking to himself:




Yes, he's a nice guy, but I think I will take this opportunity to remind you of what I have oft spoken before (once, to be exact):

"Any good relationship needs to be built on a good deal of scheming."

Yes, lady. He's a nice guy normally. But you ignore the fact that he's doing things especially for YOU. Ever notice the little things? The carrying of a tray? Allowing you a better seat, or taking you on a walk down by the duck pond? Despite these actions being dropped with the subtlety of a brick, they seem to still be wonderfully uninterpreted.






Perhaps the use of these wonderfully wangsty photos help the idea sink in.

This picture is an answer to the first. Dude, ambiguous mutual crush is thinking about you at least a million times per day. Despite the short attention span this proves, this means that they're totally into you. Now notice it.





Even though the Internet is filled with these stupid pictures, there are signs even more obvious than the ones that have A MILLION TIMES written out in bright blue text. The signs are there. They are obvious, data waiting to be observed.

Now that the obvious has been stated, let's talk about why this phenomena, this willful ignorance, exists. The answer isn't too hard to reach. When somebody ignores an outcome, it's usually for two reasons: they either think it impossible or frightening. I think we have a bit of both here. Picture time!





Like I said, fear and impossibility. "There's no way they could like me back!" Bull. You're a likable person. Get over yourself and realize how awesome you are. If they didn't think you were cool at all, they wouldn't spend time with you. If they weren't trying to win your heart, they wouldn't spend every moment they could with you. Women, here's a little secret. If a guy likes you enough to where he is desperately trying to get your attention, you probably shouldn't second-guess yourself. Another secret:





This is also bull. Guys are not good emotion readers. It almost sounds hypocritical, but it would be nice if you just came up and asked us. We would love nothing more than to hear a conversation kind of like this:

"Hello, Man"
"Hello, Woman"
"Hey, Man. I notice that you talk to me enough for this to be statistically significant. Do you "like like" me?"
"Yep"
"Wanna hold hands?"
"Yep."

One final note: you're so arrogant, you probably think this post is about you. Yeah. It might be. It might also be directed at an additional crowd.

Peace out, readers.